Wednesday, September 24, 2008 @ 03:10 | back to the top.
firstly it have been so long since i am back here...secondly really alots of things have changed... not to say the worst of all that i haven been thinking really came...
lastly my attitude have gone from worse to worst.. like tt dae.. bear call me got pro at st james there... i was so bad mood tt i go there without thinking i just wack those guys... i didn't even listen which wat i always will do first.. then i just ask bear send me back... even bear is stunt. my 11 bros have been tiring to contact me.. i will answer but with the bad attitude... sorry bros is not i dun wan to share with u.. i i dun even have the courage to face u all.. i know how much u all have done for me and tt why... i really dun even know whu i am le...
even todae.. went to play bb with si ping they all.. there come tong lin if not wrong... i know he always paly rough with elblow all those..todae he was with me the same tteam all tyhe time i also dunno y.. after i seen he eblow si ping in my brain was all fire.. therefore u will see me inside the red circle cause when i am in i dun think he will do things..even time change team i wan to be opp wit hhim but.. dunno la... dun let me have the chance is all i can sae....
haiz really la.. choke is no more choke... i think i can have the same name as bo yan.."zombie"...
Monday, September 01, 2008 @ 13:07 | back to the top.
it have been ages since i am back here...but my mood is like on fire due to someone...
i really can help it... what i wan to do is to really kill him..
i was toking to bear and fred ytd to settle on him...
what i can say is both of them ask me to cool down first dun look for him on my own account.. cause they know i really will kill him with my bare arms...
ppl u all nv know my background tt well so u dunno.. i am nto as good as all of u all thinks... i life is like so messy with this and that... haiz
no mod to even eat not to even say go out.... and cumber start his 6 month work le.. i am bored.... fuck la... i am angry again.. bye!@
Wednesday, August 13, 2008 @ 14:05 | back to the top.
haha my birthdae pass lo.. i 20 liao so sian..like tt is my 20 years of my life passed...
hee... thanks those tt actually me for my birthdae as well as wishes me...
hee.. thanks for the very very nice video by ger...
now is exam period le.. everyone seem so busy but y am i so free.. actually i also dunno.. the mood of studying still not here yet.. but i will study cause i dun wan to be depress and stress again but the result...i dun wan to let my life down..
=).... and dunno y nowadae i wan to protect ppl so much..=)
tt all ba i going down to cut my hair... haha
Wednesday, July 16, 2008 @ 01:34 | back to the top.
ok now i have learnt most of the thing and the most important just let it go..ok..so now i dun care le... just wan to study and paly...=).. bb... i tihnk u will nv see this too..haha
Wednesday, July 09, 2008 @ 22:23 | back to the top.
me very sick here..arhh... wanted to blog but really sick liao..doing project here and there..
thanks geraldine LEE.. dunno y she will pop out of my worst times everything and just by talking make me feel not better but good... dunno y she timing always so correct one.. =).. my nose sux now canot take it... i go lie on my bed le... u all take care dun be like me...
Friday, July 04, 2008 @ 00:05 | back to the top.
Choke here..really emoing..
worry over someone..
thinking this and that really tt mind is there thinking..
however choke here can do nth...
dunno y.. tihnk is my fault.. no handsome enough..
no courage at all.... shy like a fucker..
stupid like a dunno watever...
that isn't the pro..
the pro is wat am i worrying about??
why??? why can i say he will take over everything and i here nagging about??
wat man.. choke r u a man??? tell me.. wtf have u been doing...
ppl treat u good.. u like dun wan to say... I MISS YOU very diffvult to say meh???
ppl hint like so FUCKing LOTS IS LOTS OF TIMES..and u urself knows...was like SHY???
DUN cock with me SHY??? DUN see U FIGHTING SCOLD SCOLD PPL SHY...
IS lIKE u think ppl onli got u a guy??? ppl got so many guys out there u think u who..rich guy??? handsome??? wat u have u tell me??? SAY!!!
i know u have nth but records records and records in police centre...
then u think ppl wan??? u vn say onli.. say liao i think u no friends at all la... SUCKER.. IDIOTS FUCK OFF
see that wat u have done to urself... ppl will do their part is their choices.. not ur..
u bloodly idiot... u just fucked off and pass ur own messy life la...
wat can u really gif ppl.... u urself dunno.... tt it.. no use one fucked off CHOKE.........
Sunday, June 22, 2008 @ 17:22 | back to the top.
at home slept to abt 2. due to work..tired tired i am... tt all i say and very sorry sam..
sick la cannot go down.. sorry...
kind of miss my friends and BROS...
2 weeks of holidae is like no holidaes la.. haiz..
i really miss my bros.. 3 of them went to swish..
for dunno how long le..haiz
still dun wan to come back.. sianz..
thinking my life is really diff le.. work and study.
cause wat to do if u drop out the qns keep coming in to my mind..
tt y now at home i will take out my books and look when last time is a nv..
and i nv go out much le.. like i am in a cage like tt..
at home listen to songs study play psp...
but i keep having this mindset tt my life is still in a very very messy way..
maybe cause life did not go as plan or watever..
i now really got the mind set to deletle everything in my mind..
and stat a new life..
but i know tt will nv happen..
cause just like walk u will leave trace on the floor no matter wat u do to it it will stay..
just like the example..
on a whiteboard there is a black dot in the centre..
wat is on the board??
all of u all will say black board..
however have anyone think of it??
wat about the white space??
ya tt wat...like u got millions of good thinks and once there a thing u do wrong tt it.. ur life will live in tt black dot..
ar....... emooooooooooooooooooo
dunno la.. i really wan to tidy up myself and my life...
tt y my msn nick is i smile when i am at my very best...
cause now i not smiling at all.......=(
ok tt all tml ther is sch...
Wednesday, June 18, 2008 @ 12:18 | back to the top.
alot things happen haha.. but the same thing i am too lazy to blog everything out..actually i wan to blog one very long one but time la.. can now cumber is trying to ask me out for lunch..lolz
haha.. work is tiring but FUN... ok la maybe later then i continue ok??
cumber wan me go lunch.. cya
Monday, June 02, 2008 @ 23:15 | back to the top.
haiz sian lei...buddy sam happen lots of things.. my side too..
my dad things la...wat to do... haiz he really dunno how to be a father or i say a "true" father. all he know is i talk back. i am bad i go home late.. i dun study and so on so on...nvm dun tok about my dad..
btw i think all of u know i quit national le rite??? is my own thinking ba even though my coach is not happy with it..but it my health tt matter it getting worst.
haha.. now having exam but i am studying at all... ahha
Sunday, May 11, 2008 @ 17:19 | back to the top.
haiz...emo is flooding into my brain.......
just not feeling anything good...
all the bad feeling coming back...
emo is all i have now.. bye
Wednesday, April 23, 2008 @ 23:12 | back to the top.
hee got to post todae...wahaha..cause i went to sam shop with zombie and I PAY FOR MY SAMBAL RIED RICE...WAHAHAHA
lame izzit?? no if u r our buddies u will know.. he nv let us pay...
but todae i see sam tok and smile to his mum..which is the first time i see felt quite happy..=)
sam come on she is no extra we buddies can chat and laugh together which is fun tt dae tt dinner rite?? just put in more effort and DUN emo with her la...
lolz.. jyjy...
just now when to play bb... fall down..haha u all nv feel earthquake just now???
haha... but i and cumber play serious cause our friend kena look down..nvm dun tok abt tt..
kind of moody in sch.... lonely...
kind of miss alot of ppl...
james, yan, ger, sam,alot more la..haha cause i am so lonely...
mr lonely..
favourite song...haha meant for me..
take care all...
Wednesday, April 02, 2008 @ 15:50 | back to the top.
i look at my buddies blog i am the lastest post..wahaha..i am quite happy now.. not because of anyone but me.. myself..
my mum were kepping the things in her room cuase we just got a new cupboard..
then my mum come across pictures..haha..
then i look at mine very own.. when i was 1-4 after tt no photos le..
haha... very cute tt wat i see la... but now so ugly..lolz...
funnny one...haha... i just brighter up cause i see those pictures...haha..
u all can try it too.. quite nice...haha...
Wednesday, March 26, 2008 @ 00:09 | back to the top.
todae i ask zombie to accompany me to chinatown to buy a shaker tin.. but no mixing glass..when to ps to see ppl play arcade and meet my buddy at his mom's shop..
then cab back to play ball with cumber, jack and si ping.. zombie is here but nv play..
actually i ask him out is because i really dun wan to stay at home...
last week at malaysia i think of lots of things..
almost landed me and my bros in hospital.. due to driving..
cause when i not really in a gd mood i tend to go out and not think of it..
but many r so busy...
zombie can't always go out due to no $$$?
haha.. bros working..
others got stuffs to do ba.. dun wan to disturb them to..
as u all know my problem...
actually is not so bad also.. but.........
there is this very bad guilty in me....
i actually nv plan to this dae...
dissapointing really in myself and no others..
i blame no one but myself...
ok le.. no use emoing here..haha..
tml see can find whu or i go shopping..wahahha..
shock right choke go shopping lei... bye
Monday, March 24, 2008 @ 09:36 | back to the top.
Now i am really in a stress and depress ++ watever not good mood words...i am really disapointed with myself....
making so many wrong in myself...
haiz...
NS?
wtf.... not scared but...
haiz...
nvm...
bye..
Tuesday, March 04, 2008 @ 03:40 | back to the top.
it have been quite some time since i was here..very firstly is Sorry james and yan.. we were going to meet on sat but i got to work..
very sorry...
tt dae i went for my first dae of work at zouk as a bouncer...
ok la.. tt job...
tok abt it some others daes..
here i am stress abt alot of things..
there are tonnes od tihngs waiting for me to decide and do...
but i can find a answer myself...
as simple as do i continue to go back to my training??
as a 3rd year student in np.. and my coach wanted me to be in his team.. ask me to play in sch team.. kind fo think.. if i am in sch team means i will go back to national training and i will also play in above 21 and outside team...
hwoever my personal doc tok me.. "choke, i knew u are very strong in beliveing tt u can and will do ur best in basketball. However i think ur knee will not agree to tt.. at ur current x -rays ur knee can MOST likely let u go for training for 2 years and just gave off. u will think tt just gif off nth much.. but the pain it will be.. is unbearable"
after listening to wat he told me weeks ago.. i kind of go into a depress mood...
cause now in my life there is onli family, buddies,bros and basketball.
anyone just go off will make a very big diff in my life and i dun wish too..
haiz.. kind of moody... ok got to slp... bye
Wednesday, February 27, 2008 @ 02:52 | back to the top.
todae wasn't a good dae actually.. but was covered by a called from bear, psyco and alfred and nite playing bb with zombie, cumber, wee nain, jack and alex.firtly i wanted to wake up early to go down eat duck noodle which i craved for it very long le.. but in the end i slp to 11...
go lunch with mum and bro...
went to meet someone and settled things with him..
detail cannot be said as almost all of u also dunno my background haiz..
however a call from my bros trying to tok me out was really gd.. even thoguht bear is sick he still called...and the others working still called in..thx Bros
and the other is tt i am going to be a shakespear in ME in ym sch le.. cause the last one buddy which is going to study with me is going to be dismiss, dunno he can appeal anot, but todae he sounded to me like he is really going for ns le.. kind of sianz u know.. no friends = no class..
after tt we went to play ball was really fun cause we really play and sweat..
thx all...
haiz now i am still thinking of the things tt i got to settled kind of make my sleepless nite coming in..
maybe i will work as a bouncer in zouk..=)
Thursday, February 21, 2008 @ 02:27 | back to the top.
Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken. this is wat i result i the quiz.. i felt it is like so real... some la.. some i cannot cfm myself u all say ba...
Think about what you are reading because it's the truth
Why do we ((sleep)) in [[church]],
But stay ((awake)) through a [[2 hour movie]]?
Why is it so ((hard)) to talk about [[God]],
but so ((easy)) to [[Gossip]]?
Why are we so ((bored)) when we look at a [[Christian magazine]],
but find it ((easy)) to read [[Playboy]]?
Why is it so easy to ((ignore)) a [[Godly]] forwarded email,
Yet we ((forward)) the [[stupid]] ones?
Why are ((churches)) getting [[smaller]],
But ((bars and clubs)) are [[growing]]?
i come across this in my mail also.. something fun..haha
haiz.. now a daes was like "haiz"??
nvm make somemore angry.. too playful???
i spoil her dae just like tt...haha..
felt disappointed actually...
it was like know for quite long..
yet playing this kind of stuff can make it this bad...
dun really understand maybe i have changed???
or u have change to better..
puzzle me..
blur me...
disappointed me..
emo me..
Thursday, February 14, 2008 @ 12:50 | back to the top.
haha.. firstly happy V.dae to all...haha but i will be at home studying.. firstly is tml i having my math exam..and i haven touch much...then second is i got no gf so no ned to do anything hahah..
not like wee nian but 9 roses for $88..wahahah.. exp sia...then i dunno my bro go where with his gf...then bear call me tt he is going to dinner at the new feeriwheel there..haha.. rich ass.. action to me.. lame..haha...
i also dunno what to do...other then study...
let see wat happen since the lastt ime i posted...haha
ytd we went to cck cc to play bb... cumber almost fight with another guy.. haha
stupid them..wahahha.. nvm la got me no one dare fight..hahaha...
actually nth much la...
ya.. about chinese new year..
i went back to malaysia...my dad sold my house..haha.. live at small uncle house for chinese new year...
not enought parking lots for our car..haha...
small uncle got 1.. dad 1, 5 uncle 2, big uncle 1, 4 uncle 1 and me 1 haha so many...
drving back not nice sia.. see quite alot of accident...haiz...
go back everynite i just go out with my friends there to go drink lo..
haha.. we crazy 8 ppl... 4 gals 4 guys we drink up to 4k of drink in one nite...haha
we do it everydae..haha...tired sia.. there also noth to do.. haha. okok i hungry go down eat also go see how amny couple..hahah lame me...
Friday, February 01, 2008 @ 02:45 | back to the top.
dun feel like slping at the moment and i will be having class in like 11 hrs later or even shorter..cause just back from downstair.. with cumber for his supper and had a like heart to heart toks..
maybe he is like real blood bro.. cause almost everydae we spend time together..
and we tok our heart out..
wat ever problems both of us r having.. i think in this world he know me the best..
he kind of knows m background which almost no ppl knows..
my pain and my happiness.. many things...
kind of emo now...not because of toking to him but myself...
i find it so wierd...
tt i really wanted to like do this very thing but my heart dun bring me to.. and there are tonnes of reasons for it... cumber knows this...haha...
but i still can't get over it. haiz..
emo in process.. go and play game le.. bye..
Thursday, January 24, 2008 @ 13:32 | back to the top.
PHEW~ i finally finished my powerpoint presentation...accompany with my headach and dizzy... somemore ytd work until quite late.. now still have it..kind of very tired...
to dae o lvl result come out.haha...
Good luck all..~..
thanks sam fro gd luck too..haha.. thanks..